Pecans In the Gutter

Yesterday I was walking in the woods and I heard a whistle, just a short quick one, and I looked around. It was early, and though frequently I see other people on the trail, this morning it was just me. I thought maybe someone down the hill was looking for a dog so I kept walking. The whistle came again and I ignored it, but then it came again. It had to have been meant for me! I stopped and looked around, maybe a friend was hiding behind a tree and trying to trick me, but I couldn’t see anyone. I started walking and then the whistle came again. Godammit. I looked up and there in the tree was a huge black crow, looking right at me. I swear he nodded his head. We stared at each other.

I recognized him immediately. It was my stepfather, Bub, that old rascal. Ever since he died a few years ago, my kids and I have always believed he turned into a crow that follows us around. He used to hang around the telephone pole outside our house, and sometimes we’d see him at the parking lot at Starbucks. Mostly we saw him outside the school. And he was always cawing at us. Harry saw him once with a cigarette hanging out of his mouth. Who else could it be?

I continued on my walk, smiling to myself. The whistling had stopped. I remembered something I had read about how smart crows are, how they can recognize humans, how they have a complicated language. But as I walked further, I also remembered how a group of them is called a murder, how the appearance of one in a story is usually foreboding, and I started to walk slower and slower.

Oh my God.

It was a sign. I may has well have just gotten a kiss from a mafiosa. This was not good. When I got home I looked it up on the internet: Black Crow symbol. It was all there on Ask Yahoo. One person wrote in “If you see a black crow it is usually a sign that you or someone you love is about to die. But don’t worry it is just an old wives tale. J” Another person wrote “if you see a crow outside your window he probably just wants to get some pecans out of the gutter”. And we all know what that means.

Once the computer was off and my mind began to quiet, I wondered how long it takes the average person to turn something comforting into something stressful.