Yesterday I was walking through the parking lot at the grocery store, really I was staggering I was so tired, and it was already 6:30 pm and when I got home I still had to walk the dogs, make dinner, help with homework and help Darla with an audition. I hadn’t gotten much writing done and had been with my father all afternoon, I just found out my bank account was in the double digits and there was a Dodgers game going on which meant I had to sit in traffic. I was thinking about how I had to figure out how to reschedule my jury duty which I had just skipped, twice, and also decide if I was going to do community service to pay a traffic ticket fine or figure out a way to come up with $650. As I headed back to my car where Darla and Harry were still battling because Darla was practicing her song/audition and Harry was begging her to stop(ie telling her she sucks), some lady with brown hair and sunglasses cruised by me in a new black BMW and said Hi and then kept going. I looked for a second, long enough to realize I had no idea who she was, and as she passed I noticed she had Pennsylvania tags, which is where I’m from, as I turned to look again she put the car in reverse (actually she was in the passenger seat, some guy with a baseball cap was driving) and said Hi! Hey, yes hi, I’m a psychic and I see a lot going on around you, do you have a minute to talk.
STOP
This is the part in the movie where the frame freezes and the narrator, who may or may not be the main character, tells you that the tired woman carrying a grocery bag with 2 cans of cat food is a sucker for magicians, psychics and coincidences and not only believes in their power, but depends on them to help her in times of trouble, even though the odds are almost entirely against this ever happening. Already, the narrator continues, two seconds in to this exchange, this woman with the cat food is thinking:oh my god something horrible is going to happen, IhavepreviouslybeentoldI’msurroundedbyablackcloud. Whatnow? AmIgoingtojail? AmIdying?
No, I don’t (and I have to add that she shook her head sadly in a “It’s now or never babe” sort of way)
Well I have to say no then, my kids are in the car right now.
And she just pulled away slowly like she was in a funeral procession.
I wanted to run after her but I was terrified. In rapid succession, I had the following thoughts: what the hell am I carrying around. You know, my mouth turns down, especially when I’m tired or thinking, and people who don’t know me always think I’m sad or burdened, but I’m not, oh my God, it’s just my mouth. What’s wrong with me? Something horrible is about to happen. Just the appearance out of the blue!...she approached me! And on and on in the period of 10 seconds until finally I heard something sensible: how hard could it be to find a person who looks like she has “a lot going on” in a supermarket parking lot at 6:30 on a weekday night?
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