Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Things That Make You Feel Like You're in a David Lynch Movie

Noticing that your waitress has a black eye and a chipped tooth while she pours your coffee and talks in a super cheerful voice.

Hearing the sound of your feet on the pavement as a car drives slowly by and you and the driver turn your heads to see each other at the same time.

Hearing the tinkling bell of the door to the little market as you walk in to find it completely empty. Standing in silence while you notice the outdated products and then hear someone yell from the back, “No it was HAVARTI”.

Being woken up by a little person who has sleepwalked into your bed-room. As you sit up and turn on the light, he lifts his head and says “Mennepshen vre shaylu” and then walks back out. A car beeps twice outside.

Seeing a person you knew in college crying, wearing a black suit, and walking through the grocery store with an empty cart.

(Send me one of yours! Post below or tweet)


  1. Waking to find your boyfriend standing in the doorway. "Something ate Tootsie." "What? Was it coyotes." "Don't know. Salvador the gardener found a foot in the azaleas."

  2. Very large opossum walking silently into the living room late at night, joining me as I folded clothes while watching "True Blood" on the DVR.

    Hiking alone in the Santa Monica mountains, when a young barefoot black man with a machete appeared out of a culvert, said good morning, crossed the trail and disappeared into the brush.

    Standing on a rocky beach in Northern California, at first light, half-awake, when a gorgeous, large, fully alive fish was delivered by a wave directly on my bare feet.

    Choosing a watermelon at a deserted farm stand when an old man from another country appeared at my side. He was not related to the bored teenager selling the fruit. "Not that one!" "No?" "This one!" "Okay." When I cut into later it was rotten.

  3. Walking my dog late at night, the next streetlamp we are about to walk under is flickering, all is quiet, just our footsteps. then as we step under that flickering streetlamp it blows out and we are in complete darkness. And we keep on walking to the next one.

  4. Ten years back I worked in a supermarket. I worked all day Sunday. Most Saturday's I'd take acid and go driving through the woods without the lights on, sit on the roofs of libraries or talk to my dog. But it was at the supermarket the most Lynchian things happened. Remember they changed the name of Coco Pops to Choco Pops? An old man approached me as I sat on my checkout seat and held the box of Choco Pops. He was furious they'd changed the name. The box was shaking in his hand. 'They're the same,' I said. 'It's just the name.' A woman with a kid, around two years old was unloading her basket. 'It's not the fucking same.' He threw the box in my direction but it hit the mother and cut a little gash in her cheek. The shop had been open for less than 10 minutes.

  5. Thanks everyone, these are amazing. I have had my eyes and ears open to more of these since this post. It's crazy!