Thursday, May 24, 2012

Two Bugs on A Log

I'm not from here.
Oh yeah, where are you from?
Not here. That's for damn sure.
What's that supposed to mean?
What do you think it's supposed to mean?
It sounds like you're being high and mighty.
I am high and mighty.
See, that's exactly what I'm talking about.
Yeah, okay.
No seriously. What's wrong with knowing that about myself?
That you're high and mighty?
Well for one thing, if you really were, you wouldn't have to say it.
You think?
Can you please not say that.
"You think?" Ugh, I hate that so much. It's so, I don't know, ugh, it just gives me the creeps. It's so condescending and self righteous. So morning news anchor person-ish. Where you think you're attractive and smart and funny but you're really off the mark by about 3 feet in every possible way.
But I was really asking you.
You were?
Oh I thought you were using that annoying expression that everyone uses when they're desperate and alone and miserable and trying to fit in. The same ones who eat mints and use hand sanitizer all day. The ones who say "I just threw up in my mouth" when they see something disturbing and think they are being funny.
No that's not me.
It's okay.
I got carried away.
It happens.
You were saying?
I was saying I'm not from around here.
Yeah, me neither.

No comments:

Post a Comment