I don't remember the specifics of the suffering I did in high school but I know there was a lot of it. I only remember the general feeling of anger and frustration and hatred and misery. I can remember the utter disgust I could feel towards someone, mostly my mother, if asked to, say, rake the leaves outside with the rest of the family, but I don't remember why. And yes, why? I knew nothing about real suffering; at school I had friends, I had a sense of humor. Hey black hole of darkness, what gives? As both the subject of and twice-witness to this particular phase of girlhood, all I can say is I have no idea. Yes hormones, yes physical change, yes emotions, but the feeling is even larger than all that, it's somehow connected to nothing and everything in the world.
Do you get it now?
No comments:
Post a Comment