Friday, March 2, 2012

Me Vs. A Stupid Online Article

I saw online yesterday a list of "Things Women do that Men Find Annoying". I don’t know why I get distracted by these things, but I do. I’ll have battles with myself about having a look: who cares, it’s stupid. I’m trying to write! And then I’ll successfully avoid it and get on with things for 5 minutes only to “reward” myself with reading it after that. Suddenly I’m a boxer stepping into the ring: Ding Ding. Come on stupid article that just taunted me: You are going down!

I'm not going to complain about the list, because it was too stupid and obvious: Men don't like it when women are too emotional, for example, or when they talk too much. Please. But the number one item was so ridiculous it was almost inspiring.

Number 1 on the list said “Nothing says “I don’t care” more than a woman who doesn’t shave her legs”. Nothing. Nothing? More than smoking crack in front of your kids? More than wearing stained clothing? More than imitating what you just said in a whiny, sniveling voice? NOTHING PEOPLE! 

Off the top of my head I thought of my own quick list:
Nothing says "I don't care" 
-more than a guy who snorts up a big meaty glop of phlegm and then spits while you're walking together.
-more than a guy who scratches his balls and then sniffs his fingers,
-more than a guy who has a bottle of pee next to his bed.

I could go on but,  #1 Ladies and Gentlemen: Nothing says I DON'T CARE
-more than a guy who doesn't use his powers of observation.
I win! And get back to my real work.

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