My Dilemma

Dear Readers,

    A few posts ago, I told a few of you to fuck the fuck off with your “realistic” and “sensible” and “all-knowing” comments on the whole Kony video thing. I want you to know I felt bad about it. It weighed on me for the rest of the day after I wrote it. I kept thinking I am not the type of person who tells a complete stranger to fuck the fuck off, what was I thinking? I was just acting cocky because I’m here alone in the room, stretched out on the couch with the computer in my lap, and it sounded a little sassy and funny. My stomach ached. But then the days went by and more geniuses that spend half the day writing comments on facebook and news sites, and the other half watching porn in their poop-stained underpants, had to throw in their two cents about why the whole Kony video thing, along with the group that produced it Invisible Children, was a scam and bladitty blah blah. In a Thurston Howell the III voice they went on and on, “manipulative this” and “American white man savior complex that” which was all just a way of saying “I am smart”, “I read about this things”, “I am not naïve”, “I am not manipulated by watching a boy weeping about missing his precious brother who had his throat slit open in front of him” and oh sweet Jesus, fuck the fuck off.

   I am the person who says fuck the fuck off to complete strangers, I realized. But I always feel bad afterwards. I’m not yet to the point where I can say it and then do a little Irish click of the heels, but it comes out pretty easily. Later on, when I get to the stew and mull portion of my day (i.e. when I should be sound asleep dreaming sweet dreams), I get heavy hearted. This is my dilemma.

Yours truly,

Deird

P.S. Which of these guys in the photo would you choose as a boyfriend? The one on top looks like a barrel of laughs!