Roadside Stands

A pumpkin in March? I'll take 2.

If someone ever wanted to kill me, all they’d have to do is set themselves up at a roadside stand and wait for me to drive by. The stand would have to be in a remote place, not abandoned, not desolate, just, well, un-trafficked: the side of a narrow dirt road by the exit of a canyon, for example, or a neighborhood street. They would need to have their wares displayed on a rickety card table, a home- made stand, or in the back of a truck; it would help if they had a handwritten sign somewhere but that’s not crucial. The main thing they would need is no other customers and a look on their face like they haven’t seen another human in 5 years. If it’s a kid, or a gaggle of kids, then the sad expression doesn’t matter, they just need to stand there and I will stop. They could have my throat slit in a matter of seconds.

Here are a few things I have purchased from roadside stands:

Lemonade

Corn on a stick

Watermelon

Hair clips

Tube socks

Second hand clothes

Here are a few things I have looked at and not purchased

Puppies

Old rotten toys

New crappy toys

Fish

Piles of mildewed clothing

I will stop even if I’m already late to where I’m heading. I will stop if I’m going 40 mph (just jam on the breaks, shoot past by 50 yards and put it in reverse). I will stop even if I have no money (Just hold this for me would ya, I need to go to the ATM), but mostly I will stop because I love these people. I love that they got an idea, made a plan and followed through. I love that they are hopeful and working outside. I used to love having lemonade stands when I was little. I remember that it was an actual thrill when a car pulled over. Every time. It was a surprise. And that’s always a good thing.